She took a book from her bag. A folded white paper fell from inside the book cover to the ground. Seeing her momentarily stunned expression, I guessed someone must have secretly slipped it in.
The paper fell right at my feet. I just needed to bend down to pick it up. Just as I picked it up, Vanessa, quick as lightning, snatched it from my hand. The expression on her face flashed with awkwardness.
I said nothing, just stood up and walked to the hallway, breathing in the warm spring sunshine. Sunlight shone on me, gentle and warm, not glaring at all.
Just now, I'd seen that white paper revealing a portrait sketch beneath. When the wind lifted it, a corner of the paper exposed two words. Nathan Shaw. My name.
I suddenly remembered Aju's request, remembered Vanessa from the previous world, remembered her answer in that interview. My chest suddenly felt heavy. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, then slowly exhaled.
I kept dreaming of Vanessa. In my dreams, all scenes of her dying, but always smiling. Perhaps my heart had already begun to waver. Could I still pretend to be an outsider? But what could I possibly do? How could I change the outcome of her suicide?
Very soon, graduation photo day arrived. The teacher called classmates to line up. I saw Vanessa receive a phone call, then break from the formation and leave. In the previous life, she also didn't come for graduation photos. Could it also be because of this phone call?
The school gate controlled entry and exit strictly. During class hours, students couldn't go out. So where was she going? I stood in the hallway, saw her heading toward the wooded area behind the school. What was Vanessa doing there?
The class president's urging voice rang in my ears. I had no choice but to follow the class downstairs. When we reached the photo location, while waiting, everyone held phones taking commemorative photos for each other. I felt uneasy, constantly checking my phone for the time. Finally, I turned and ran toward the wooded area, then bumped right into Vanessa at a turn.
I grabbed her tight, nearly falling. I quickly let go. Both ears burning hot, flushing a light pink. I breathed heavily, looking past her, and saw the disciplinary teacher dragging several students to the administration office. Among them was someone quite famous at school, a mischievous girl who refused to study and often caused trouble.
"Are you okay?" I looked her up and down. She didn't seem injured at all.
"How did you know I was here?"
Under Vanessa's probing gaze, I nodded. "I just saw you heading this way. It's almost time for photos. When you didn't come back, I came looking. Good thing you're okay. It's almost photo time. Let's go."
I'd just turned to leave when Vanessa's voice drifted past my ear on the wind. "You came looking for me. Why? For what reason?"
Because I seemingly could no longer pretend not to see the fate in her life.
Wind blew from behind, my hair lifted by the wind, messily falling across my forehead. I said softly, "I'm worried about you."
When we returned to the photo location, it was just our class's turn. The teacher and class president kept shouting loudly, urging me to stand in the empty spot in the row. Vanessa stood right in front of me, looking straight into the camera lens.
Suddenly, an image flashed through my mind. In the previous world, Vanessa had been absent from the photo session. The next day, I'd once seen several fresh cuts on her arm, and that troublemaking girl was later advised to withdraw from school. In this life, Vanessa also left the group to meet her, but returned safely, and the other girl was caught by the disciplinary teacher.
And all the changes in her, her attitude toward me — all these scattered fragments of memory suddenly pieced together into a clear thread. Could it be that Vanessa, like me, had also awakened her memories?
The shutter sound clicked several times. The photographer raised his hand signaling okay. The teacher stood up, letting the next class come for photos. I was pulled aside by some guys to take a few more shots.
Vanessa stood under the tree across from us. Beside her were several boys eagerly wanting to take photos with her.
After taking a few shots, I heard Grace's laughter. I walked closer. "Can I take one with you?"
Grace nodded happily. "Of course."
I handed my phone to a friend to help take the photo. Standing next to Grace, I raised my hand in a V sign.
"Remember to send me one later."
"Yeah." I smiled and nodded. "Got it."
"Let's take one together." Vanessa had somehow appeared behind me. In her eyes was a trace of anticipation.
"Sure," I answered.
We stood beside each other, only half an arm's length between us. Because doubt was rising in my heart that she'd awakened her memories, I instinctively leaned slightly, looking up at her. Sensing my gaze, she also looked back. In the moment our eyes met, her gaze flickered slightly. A few seconds later, it withdrew.
The photographer returned my phone to me. This one had turned out beautifully. On the screen, he had perfectly captured the moment we looked at each other. I added Vanessa to my contacts, then sent her the photo. She stared at her phone for a long time. I saw the corner of her mouth curve slightly upward.
The next morning at school, I made an excuse, going to the teacher's office to ask for an extra practice test, and ran into the disciplinary teacher sitting drinking tea. I suddenly remembered yesterday's incident. For a moment, I didn't know how to start.
"Hello, teacher."
The disciplinary teacher nodded slightly at me. I took a few more steps forward.
"Yesterday my classmate Vanessa Liu almost got bullied in the wooded area. Lucky you were there just in time. Saved her in time. Really, thank you so much. Vanessa is my deskmate. I'm very worried about her."
The disciplinary teacher angrily scolded that troublemaking girl, then told me, "Good thing your friend Vanessa called me beforehand."
"She called you?"
Through the conversation with the teacher, I roughly understood what had happened yesterday. There was someone fairly close to Vanessa. That person called to arrange a meeting with Vanessa. Vanessa heard something abnormal in their words, so she had called the disciplinary teacher first. The teacher had taught her and even visited her home, and still had her phone number. Mentioning the home visit, the disciplinary teacher sighed.
I took the test paper and returned to class, organizing in my head what I'd just heard. Everything was clear now. Vanessa in the previous life had been betrayed by that friend. So this time she planned to strike first.
Indeed, she had awakened. Everything from the previous life she remembered clearly.
The disappearance of the task takers and Aju — was it related to her awakened memories? Carrying memories back, would she this time continue making the world disappear?